Recently 02/28/23

Recently, I’ve been thinking about a lot of things. Random things.

I like to write to myself. Dear Rachel, you’re gonna hate what I’m about to say…

I recently read one of my letters to me. I wrote,

“The only thing I can do is write. I want to write how I feel. I don’t know where to start. ‘Start from the start,’ I usually say.”

Starting from the start, I feel hyperaware of the growth happening around me, the changing factors of nature, the flowers blooming, but just in a different way this time around.

I start from the start, yet blinks of the present always come into the lens.

When I was growing up, I had no clue what I was going to do in the future. I still don’t.

My mom recently saw my Instagram posts and my grades. She told me that on the outside I look like I’m thriving.

When I turned 15, I had red hair. Henna-dyed. It was awesome.

I’ve recently seen my Instagram posts and my grades. Things look fine. Why don’t they feel that way?

When I was learning to walk, I didn’t crawl. I scooted on my butt. There’s video proof. I will not be showing it.

Recently, I’ve been thinking about a lot of things.

They’re all connected, intertwined within my life.